Ann Landers and Dear Abby: Twins with Double Birth Orders

Esther Lederer – Ann Landers

Pauline Phillips – Abigail Van Buren

This is the life of two twin sisters who both pursued the same path, that of advice columnists.   Although twins there were differences.  With every set of twins,  one assumes the higher birth order.  In their case it was Esther, known as Eppie, that was 17 minutes older.

Family Birth Order Diagram

Third Borns

Both girls were the third birth so they share Third born characteristics.  These include the ability to understand people and size up situations involving people with almost a psychic ability.

They tend to be intuitive and care most about the human condition, but can also be artistic and theatrical. Emotionally they show a happy face to the world but can cover up their more sensitive side privately.

First Borns

Esther (Ann Landers) carries the first born characteristics with her third born birth order. The firstborn wants to keep the throne and will try to be the first and best in everything they do.

They like to wield power over others and at times can be caustic in their attempt to get their point across. Failure is not an option so life can be difficult trying to please others and be perfect. They feel they have the “right” answers.

Second Borns

Pauline (Dear Abby) carries the Second born characteristics with her Third born birth order.  The Second born does not like to be told what to do.  They are not as driven as the Firstborn but know their weak spots and love to point out to them they are not perfect. They are more light hearted and social as they don’t take things as personally.

Sibling Disaffection

With the twins having Double birth orders they switch between the same birth order #3, and their other birth orders a #1 and #2. When they are both acting like 3’s they are full of love for each other. When they are acting like #1’s and #2’s they are rival siblings. Sibling rivalry is usually strongest between the first and second children.

In their case they were the first and second children in the second family. The five year gap between the twins and their older siblings created the Double birth order.  During their early life they were inseparable, both primarily showing the number 3 birth order characteristics. They wrote an advice column in college and even had a double wedding ceremony.

Related: The Double Birth Order of Senator Harry Reid

Their Marriages

Esther dumped her fiancé and two weeks later married the millinery salesman who she met while shopping for her veil. Her marriage to Jules Lederer founder of Budget Rent -A -Car lasted 36 years but ended in divorce. He admitted having an affair.

Pauline told Esther it was her fault which didn’t help the sister relationship. This would have been typical for a number Two to aggravate the older sibling. Pauline married Morton Phillips heir to the family liquor business. Esther felt betrayed when Pauline created her own advice column just  months  after she continued the Ann Landers column.  They would fuel the competitive drive the rest of their lives.

Their Different Styles

Pauline’s column answers  were more friendly then Esther’s, who was more abrupt. She resented Pauline’s financial success although both sisters were very successful. Pauline seemed to have a more personal attachment to her readers.

Twins with Double Birth Orders

Here was an interesting example of Twins that ended up with double birth orders.  The combination of birth orders, a double birth order, creates a more complicated person.  These two women though alike in many ways, exemplify the extreme differences birth orders can create. Let me hear from you if you have any twins in your family?